Jesus often had the harshest things to say to the Religious leaders of his day. The Pharisees would come to Jesus to ask him questions or present him with situations in an attempt to trap him. Jesus never gave in to their tactics and often surprised them with the many things he said or did. Those who lead people in prayer came with an understanding and expectation that their robes and status brought them prestige and honor. For many of them, Jesus was a threat because of his acceptance of those who had been marginalized by the system. Up to the point in today's Gospel of Matthew 19:13 to 22, Jesus had met every challenge and the next would be no exception.
Jesus said: "Let the little children come to me, and do not stop them; for it is to such as these that the kingdom of heaven belongs." (Matthew 19:14).
According to the Collegeville Bible Commentary in the New Testament Volume when Jesus talks of the children here, he is speaking of those who have no legal rights to claim anything. (See Page 888 and 890 for references.) They come with nothing and they have no claim to anything and therefore whatever they receive is understood as a gift from the giver. It is received with gratitude and total dependence upon the one who has given the gift. They trust and they also risk. They often learn the hard way who they should and should not trust. It is by trial and error and no matter how painful the lesson learned is, they keep on looking and trusting and wondering.
How are we in our relationship with God? Do we come to God as God's people knowing full well that all that we receive from God's hand is a gift? Do we understand that every opportunity, every person, every thing big and small is from God. Or do we limit our appreciation of God's gracious love that if it doesn't come quite the way we think it should be, then we are like spoiled brats? If you have fallen into the latter category, you are in the right club. The Church is not for all those who have it together. The Church is here precisely because growing in our understanding of ourselves, one another and God is an every day and every event experience. Today is an opportunity given by God to open up our minds and hearts and to see beyond where we are and allow God to shape our lives by God's goodness.
As part of this blog post for today, I would like to talk specifically about one area in which children are constantly violated and given the wrong message. They come with their child-like innocence and they want to know about the nature of their own bodies. I am of course, talking about sexuality. I am bringing up this topic as part of the reflection on this Gospel, because children often approach the subject of sexuality as a gift to be explored and understood. Yet, all too often over the years and centuries it is the one subject that parents and religious folk have often chased them away from or tried much too hard to control. As a result children often grow up with a false view of their sexuality. And if by chance a child reaches an age of reason where they begin to understand that their sexuality is a bit different than others expectations, the responses given to them are often misguided and show a lack of compassion. This is one of the reasons why homelessness and suicides among LGBT and questioning youth is so high.
Just yesterday in the Advocate there was the story of how one church that was closed down became a place for homeless gay and lesbian teens to find a place to sleep. "A church-turned-shelter for homeless youth in Queens, New York is a far cry from sleeping on the streets after a $200,000 renovation and a partnership with the Ali Forney Center for LGBT youth." This is very great news. However, the issue that brings so many LGBT youth to this stage is not very good news at all. This means that there are still way too many LGBT children, teens and youth who are experiencing rejection from their families when they discover their sexual orientation and/or gender identity. In situations like these, the wrong messages have been sent. It is time to open up hearts and minds to new ways of talking about LGBT issues between parents and their children.
Sexuality whether heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual is a gift from God. A gift from God too is a sense of one's gender and/or their seeing with in them a gender different than the one they currently have. The body is one matter, but the person and the soul within is the one that needs to be loved, cherished and taught how much God and their parents love them no matter what the outcome. Most LGBT children when they later come out often say that their one desire is for their parents and closest friends to know that they are still the same person they always were even though they are gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgendered. When children and youth come out to their parents only to be met with rejection or a parents plea to change, the interior person in the child is just crushed and confused. I have heard story after story of some gay teens and youth who after they came out to their parents were told that if they wanted any money to go to college or if they wanted to participate in the family business, they had to go to gay "change" therapy or ex-gay ministries. These and other efforts including reparative therapy are harmful and destructive. Just this past summer The American Psychological Association produced the results of their study on "change therapy" that showed how harmful such therapies are. Yet, many ministers, Priests, Bishops and parents continue to suggest such ideas to their children when they come out. It is in moments like these that children and their understandings of their sexuality are so violated. It is scandalizing to children and it can destroy their faith. No wonder so many LGBT individuals have rejected the Church that has so often rejected them.
We need to be supporting LGBT and questioning youth services and organizations. We need to help spread the word that sexuality is not a dirty or shameful subject. LGBT and questioning youth are part of God's creation too. They need help to understand the nature of their body and their capacity to love and be loved is a beautiful and wonderful gift. There is also no doubt in my mind that safer sex practices needs to be taught so that children can know and understand how to take responsibility with their own bodies and to be concerned about the health of the bodies of others. This closed discussion and constant message that sex, sexual orientation and/or gender expression and/or identity being a subject of shame, confusion and ugliness has got to stop. Children come with their gift of sexuality all thankful to the One who made them who they are, it is a terrible message for them to receive from a parent, minister, priest, bishop or Pope that somehow their God-given gift to love and be loved by others is somehow less beautiful and wonderful than it is.
O God, giver of every good and perfect gift may we have a thankful heart; help us to be people who see our sexuality as part of your loving plan for our lives. Give to parents the ability to love unconditionally. Help parents when they are told that their child is lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgendered to still see their children as gifts and their sexuality and/or gender expression and/or identity is part of your loving plan for their lives. May there be compassion and understanding. May there be places for run away, questioning or trouble LGBT and other youth to go. May the Church rise up to these and other challenges by responding with the love and compassion and understanding of the Holy Spirit, we ask this through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.
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