Scriptural Basis
Matthew 28:18-20 (NRSV)
Jesus came and said to the disciples, "All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything that I have commanded you. And remember, I am with you always, to the end of the age."
Blog Reflection
Coming out and telling other people that we are lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, questioning and/or queer is a sharing of the Gospel story in and through our lives. Many individuals including myself have had our experiences of coming out to mean that we finally gain our peace with God about who we are and how we love others.
The Gospel for today's commemoration of St. Philip the Deacon calls not only the ordained ministers of the Church to share the story of God's salvation, but it is the baptismal duty of all who call themselves followers of Jesus Christ.
In Paul's letter to the Romans, he writes:
For as in one body we have many members, and not all the members have the same function, so we, who are many, are one body in Christ, and individually we are members one of another. We have gifts that differ according to the grace given to us: prophecy, in proportion to faith; ministry, in ministering; the teacher, in teaching; the exhorter, in exhortation; the giver, in generosity; the leader, in diligence; the compassionate, in cheerfulness. (Romans 12: 4-8).
The gifts that are given to each person to be used for the work of sharing the Gospel are not limited to those named in Romans, they are also found in the very nature of who we are and how we love other people. They are also related to how we allow other people to love us. We cannot be about the work of sharing and proclaiming the salvation of God through Jesus effectively, so long as we are not honest with God, ourselves and those closest to us about who we are as LGBTQ people and how we love others, and who it is that others are loving in us.
I have faced this reality in my own life by coming out not once, but twice in the course of my life. I have shared bits and pieces in my blog before. But, I am all too happy to share again for the benefit that someone might read my blog and find themselves some where between the words that I am typing here.
I knew there was something different about me since I was twelve or thirteen years old. While most of my peers were into sports, getting hard-ons looking at the girls and cars, I was just not there. I was interested in playing the organ back at home, watching tv, getting into music, arts and eventually Christian Spirituality and at age 16 the Bible. I also knew that I was attracted to men instead of women. But my father one day threatened me by saying that if I were gay, he would send me to a doctor to have me fixed. And a Pastor at the local Advent Christian Church told me that being attracted to men was not natural and could never be condoned by God or the Bible.
I lived in the fear of the possibility that I could be gay for many years. But, I could not shake my interest in men both physically, sexually and emotionally. I often had many best friends that I fell in love with. Even at Eastern Nazarene College while I was there studying for a church music degree from 1988 to 1994. As I was nearing graduation from college, I later became interested in Roman Catholicism, very possibly the Priesthood or monastic life. One year after I graduated from college, I converted to the Catholic church and for many years worked as a parish organist and music director. During that time, I seriously considered a vocation to become a Priest or a Monk, but I was turned down by many Diocese' and Monasteries. The most common complaint was that I was "socially disordered" for my emotional intimacy with other men.
In the year 2000 after my father died, the reality of who I am met me face to face and there was no more getting away from it. In October of 2000 after a whole summer of turmoil and chaos I came out and began telling people that I am gay. From that day until May of 2009, my relationship with the Roman Catholic Church was forever changed.
In January of 2001 I moved from New England to live in the Minneapolis area where I continued to work as a church musician with limited success. But the reality of who I am as a gay person, and my being very proud of being gay, led me to many disappointments and prejudice working for Catholic Parishes here.
After two failed relationships, many failed jobs and difficulties finding my place in the LGBT communities, I began attending the Catholic church's ex-gay group Courage that was begun by Cardinal Cook in New York in the early 1980's. You can all read my experience with Courage at Beyond Ex-Gay.
In November of 2008 after some truth was revealed to me about how damaging Courage was and still is, I left attending their meetings and came back out. I met my partner Jason on February 7, 2009 we fell in love and we now share our lives together.
In May of 2009 after my relationship with the Catholic church had been so bad since I came out, and given their support of a horrible organization called Courage, Jason and myself began attending St. Mark's Episcopal Cathedral in Minneapolis, Minnesota. On May 15, 2010 Jason was confirmed and I was received as a member of the Episcopal Church by Bishop Brian Prior, IX Bishop of Minnesota. Among my many influences in the Episcopal Church is Bishop Gene Robinson, Bishop John Shelby Spong, Rev. Susan Russell, Rev. Canon Gray Temple and Rev. Paul Bresnahan. Thank God for all of them.
Among the names in the LGBT community at large who inspire me is the late Harvey Milk. The living Cleve Jones, Joe Jervis, Pam Spaulding, Alvin McEwen and Jeremy Hooper.
After I came out again and since, I have made myself a resolution that I will be the gay, Episcopalian that I believe God wants me to be. I cannot allow who I am to be decided or dictated by an LGBT stereo type, social expectation, or church conference or leader. I have to love people in the way God created me to love. I cannot love another person as a man who is straight, because I am not a straight man. I cannot allow another person to love me as a person loves another straight man. I am not a straight man. I love myself, my God, my partner and the people I socialize, work with and/or worship as a gay man. And I am proud of who and what God created me to be. And very happy to serve God as a man who is gay. After many years of struggling to understand myself, to look at myself in the mirror and no longer be ashamed to say I am a gay man, in love with another gay man, and know in my heart that God loves me that way and celebrates me that way, is a peace that the world cannot give.
I am also very proud of our Bishop who has written a response about the constitutional amendment that would ban marriage equality in Minnesota.
From its very origins, the Episcopal Church in Minnesota has always stood with the marginalized. Race, ethnicity, gender, gender orientation or immigrant we have embraced both the Gospel mandate of love of neighbor and the Baptismal Covenant imperative to respect the dignity of every human being. Any actions, whether sacred or secular — such as the proposed constitutional amendment to prohibit our LGBT brothers and sisters from the rights and privileges that the rest of Minnesotans enjoy - are considered to be marginalizing and contrary to the Gospel, the Baptismal Covenant and our history.
The Rt. Rev. Brian N. Prior
IX Bishop, Episcopal Church of Minnesota
I do not have to be a Bible thumping Dominionist to be a true follower of Jesus Christ, and in love with the Church, the Sacraments and the message of salvation. I also do not have to be defined by the LGBTQ community as totally untrusting of the Christian religion to some day change the hearts and minds of many people about LGBTQ people and all other marginalized persons. I also do not have to justify the Church when its leaders and communicants speak or act in a manner that is contrary to the Gospel when LGBTQ and other marginalized persons are continually marginalized and exploited.
Today's commemoration is about sharing the Gospel message through ministry and service of God's people. Coming out and being part of the movement on behalf of those who are forgotten, stigmatized and oppressed is just one way of participating in that work of sharing the Gospel. It is a part any LGBTQ person can participate at any point in time. But, it is important to begin with being honest with yourself, God and others around you. Resisting the message of Christianists and those who tell us that we are sick, pedophiles and dangerous to family and children. Being LGBTQ is wonderful, holy and beautiful. God saw all that God made about us, and said "it is very good."
Prayers
Holy God, no one is excluded from your love, and your truth transforms the minds of all who seek you: As your servant Philip was led to embrace the fullness of your salvation and to bring the stranger to Baptism, so give us all the grace to be heralds of the Gospel, proclaiming your love in Jesus Christ our Savior, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, now and for ever. Amen. (Holy Men, Holy Women, Celebrating the Saints, page 635).
Lord, we pray that your grace may always precede and follow us, that we may continually be given to good works; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, now and for ever. Amen. (Proper 23, Book of Common Prayer, page 235).
O God, you made us in your own image and redeemed us through Jesus your Son: Look with compassion on the whole human family; take away the arrogance and hatred which infect our hearts; break down the walls that separate us; unite us in bonds of love; and work through our struggle and confusion to accomplish your purposes on earth; that, in your good time, all nations and races may serve you in harmony around your heavenly throne; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen. (Book of Common Prayer, page 815).
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