Wednesday of Holy Week: The Betrayal of a Friend

Scriptural Basis

John 13:21-32 (NRSV)

At supper with his friends, Jesus was troubled in spirit, and declared, "Very truly, I tell you, one of you will betray me." The disciples looked at one another, uncertain of whom he was speaking. One of his disciples-- the one whom Jesus loved-- was reclining next to him; Simon Peter therefore motioned to him to ask Jesus of whom he was speaking. So while reclining next to Jesus, he asked him, "Lord, who is it?" Jesus answered, "It is the one to whom I give this piece of bread when I have dipped it in the dish." So when he had dipped the piece of bread, he gave it to Judas son of Simon Iscariot. After he received the piece of bread, Satan entered into him. Jesus said to him, "Do quickly what you are going to do." Now no one at the table knew why he said this to him. Some thought that, because Judas had the common purse, Jesus was telling him, "Buy what we need for the festival"; or, that he should give something to the poor. So, after receiving the piece of bread, he immediately went out. And it was night.

When he had gone out, Jesus said, "Now the Son of Man has been glorified, and God has been glorified in him. If God has been glorified in him, God will also glorify him in himself and will glorify him at once."

Blog Reflection

If there is any place in the Gospels that most people can identify with Jesus, this is it.  The betrayal of a friend who sits at the dinner table.

I think most of us are unaware just how "sacred" the dinner table is.  The dinner table is where families come together to share their food, conversations, difficulties and celebrate together as a family.

Most movies that we watch have some amazing drama at a dinner table.  Such as the hilarious family conversation at the dinner table in While You Were Sleeping.  The exchange of gossip at the table where Sissy and Latrelle talk about everyone and anyone in Sordid Lives.  Some of the worst break ups occur at a dinner table in either someone's home or a restaurant. 

Nothing pierces the heart of a person more than experiencing the betrayal of a friend.  The betrayal experienced when a friend or a spouse totally destroys our trust in them, can feel worse than being cut.   The anger and bitterness that comes when we are betrayed by someone we loved or thought loved us is deep and takes a long time to heal.

In our Gospel today, Jesus experiences that betrayal first hand.  As Judas becomes the one who will betray Jesus, all we can do is look and understand.  Jesus has let us know that God walks with us even through the deep pain of being hurt by someone we have cared about.  Yet, Jesus does something that is very difficult for most of us to do.  Jesus loves Judas anyway. 

The betrayal that is portrayed in this Gospel is not unlike what many lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, questioning and queer people experience when they come out to their families, friends, church communities, bosses and closest companions.  Many LGBTQ youth have been thrown out of their homes when they come out to their parents. The same parents who always told all their children: "We will love you no matter what."   They turn to their friends for support, only to find that their closest friends betray and abandon them because they become "guilty by association" in school and in the community, or even their own family.   And not to be left out, church communities.  Many pastors will tell distraught LGBT Youth that they can stay, but only if they submit themselves to an ex-gay group, or they keep really quiet about things so as "not to stir the pot." 

The betrayal that Jesus experiences is not unlike what many gay and bisexual men know when they have contracted HIV or any other sexually transmitted disease by someone who told them, that they loved them. 

Many transgender people are told by someone who is interested in dating her or him, that they are accepted as they are, until that someone learns they are transgender and hurts or kills them.

Bisexual individuals feel a sense of betrayal as they struggle with who should they love or form a relationship with, knowing that they want so much more from folks of both sexes. 

Imagine the betrayal that immigrants experience when they hear that America is such a welcoming place that is suppose to be equal for all, only to come here and be interrogated and thrown out of the country by unjust laws. 

The feelings of betrayal experienced by so many women by the man who says that he loves them, only to leave them when they get pregnant so as not to take equal responsibility for the welfare of the woman or the child, are so deep and painful.  And when the woman continues to be rejected by her parents that are oh so "pro-life" leaving her to fend for herself, and a political system that works against her health care, feelings of betrayal are almost guaranteed.

I think the greatest message that we can all read from today's Gospel is that God knows what betrayal is.   In Jesus' experiences God goes through the events of being betrayed right along side us.  God knows the embarrassment, the shame, the fear, the anxiety and the pain we feel when someone we've had deep feelings about lets us down. 

As we follow the events of Holy Week, we will see that these events as tragic as they are, are not the final and only word.  There is new life on Easter Sunday following the events of Good Friday.  God's grace is ever present with us and works with our situation to lead us to a place of peace, serenity and joy.

LGBT individuals, immigrants, women and all others marginalized by the Church and society can find the grace to keep on going and do what is best for themselves, by trusting in the very love and mercy of God.

Prayer

Lord God, whose blessed Son our Savior gave his body to be whipped and his face to be spit upon: Give us grace to accept joyfully the sufferings of the present time, confident of the glory that shall be revealed; through Jesus Christ your Son our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. Amen. (Prayer for Wednesday of Holy Week, Book of Common Prayer, page 220).

Lord, make us instruments of your peace. Where there is hatred, let us sow love; where there is injury, pardon; where there is discord, union; where there is doubt, faith; where there is despair, hope; where there is darkness, light; where there is sadness, joy. Grant that we may not so much seek to be consoled as to console; to be understood as to understand; to be loved as to love. For it is in giving that we receive; it is in pardoning that we are pardoned; and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life. Amen. (Prayer Attributed to St. Francis, Book of Common Prayer, page 833).

O God, of all, whose Son commanded us to love our enemies: Lead them and us from prejudice to truth; deliver them and us from hatred, cruelty, and revenge; and in your good time enable us all to stand reconciled before you; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen. (Prayer for our Enemies, Book of Common Prayer, page 816).