Then the Jews began to complain about him because he said, "I am the bread that came down from heaven." They were saying, "Is not this Jesus, the son of Joseph, whose father and mother we know? How can he now say, 'I have come down from heaven'?" Jesus answered them, "Do not complain among yourselves. No one can come to me unless drawn by the Father who sent me; and I will raise that person up on the last day. It is written in the prophets, 'And they shall all be taught by God.' Everyone who has heard and learned from the Father comes to me. Not that anyone has seen the Father except the one who is from God; he has seen the Father. Very truly, I tell you, whoever believes has eternal life. I am the bread of life. Your ancestors ate the manna in the wilderness, and they died. This is the bread that comes down from heaven, so that one may eat of it and not die. I am the living bread that came down from heaven. Whoever eats of this bread will live forever; and the bread that I will give for the life of the world is my flesh."
Shortly after I left the Catholic church's ex-gay ministry called Courage and the relationship between Jason and I began to form, I had to seriously consider what my option B for a new church family would be. I was growing less and less fond of the Catholic church after my experiences as a professional musician in various parishes, as well as my experience with Courage. I was very certain that I no longer wanted to be obedient to a Papacy and an Archdiocese that did not recognize who I am without labeling my love for my partner as "intrinsically disordered." (See the Catechism of the Catholic Church, Page 566). I also did not want to continue to feel as if I was held hostage by a system that is so broken with pedophilia, pastoral irresponsibility and a total lack of accountability for what the church is ignoring. But, there was one thing that I knew I did not want to give up, my belief in the Real Presence of Christ in the Holy Eucharist. That is why I am so happy and proud to call the Episcopal Church my new church home.
A few years ago the teaching about the Real Presence of Christ in the Holy Eucharist was brought home to me. The Bishop who helped make it happen is certainly not among the more progressive Bishops in the Catholic church. But the conviction and the reasons that he gave for believing that Jesus Christ is present in the Eucharist is a lesson that I am eternally thankful to him for. Even if I do not appreciate his opinions about being gay and exercising same sex love within a loving, committed relationship. The Episcopal Church has brought the teaching of the Presence of Christ in the Eucharist to a new level for me. In J.B. Bernardin's book An Introduction to the Episcopal Church he writes: "The important thing is not how our Lord is present in the Sacrament, but that through the Sacrament His Presence becomes real in the life of the person receiving it." (Page 103). The Real Presence of Christ in the Eucharist is what Jesus is teaching throughout the 6th chapter of John's Gospel. Speaking totally for myself that is why it is among my favorite of all Gospels.
What does the Presence of Jesus Christ in the Holy Eucharist become real in the lives of lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgendered, questioning and queer people? How can LGBTQ people allow the Real Presence of Christ to be real in our lives? I believe that among the answers to these questions is found in what we accept, what we reject and how we conduct our lives based on who we are and what we believe.
The Presence of Christ is real in the lives of LGBTQ people when we rightfully reject the prejudices of the Church and society in the basis of sexual orientation and/or gender identity/expression. We also reflect the Presence of Christ when we accept that all individuals regardless of their race, class, gender, national origin, financial means, religion, challenge, etc are created in the image and likeness of God and therefore are to be treated with dignity and respect. When we challenge the Church and society to see beyond the "isms" and see the "person" who is affected by the rules made about certain "isms" and we speak out about the injustices placed on people based on "isms" Jesus becomes really present. LGBTQ Christians make Christ present when we take to heart that Jesus is the Bread of Life for our souls that helps us continue the work of equality even in the midst of disappointing and unjust set backs. When we cling to Jesus and trust in him as we work through coming out issues, job situations, relationships, deal with addictions Christ is made present as we seek healthy relationships and behaviors.
Lest I give the impression that Jesus is present only when we are perfect, Jesus is also present when we struggle to understand those things that we really cannot comprehend, but are willing to try to trust in God when the going is difficult. When we are brokenhearted, missing someone special, angry with a parent or Priest who has rejected us, Jesus the Bread of Life comes in the Eucharist to help us face our emotions with a sense of honesty so that the Holy Spirit can help us find some kind of healing.
Jesus Christ is also made really present in our love making, in our mutually honest, loving and committed relationships. God is also present when we need to work through communication breakdowns and those times when try as we might, we just cannot make a relationship work the way we would like to. Christ is present when we open ourselves up to God's Presence and with sincere hearts full of anger we tell God we need God to help make things right. It is okay to tell God we are angry about things not working the way we think they should. The answers we may get may not be the answers we want, but the answer we get will be God giving us the best God can give us for the moment we are in. Sometimes God's answer is to send the Holy Spirit so that we may accept God's will as being best. (See Luke 11: 5-13). When we accept God's answer to our prayers, Christ is really present in our lives. So the Eucharist is made real.
As we prepare to visit our churches tomorrow, let us ask God to help us make the Presence of Christ in the Eucharist more real in our lives.
Almighty God, you have given your only Son to be for us a sacrifice for sin, and also an example of godly life: Give us grace to receive thankfully the fruits of this redeeming work, and to follow daily in the blessed steps of his most holy life; through Jesus Christ your Son our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, now and for ever. Amen. (Collect 15, Book of Common Prayer, Page 232).
Almighty and eternal God, so draw our hearts to you, so guide our minds, so fill our imaginations, so control our wills, that we may be wholly yours, utterly dedicated unto you; and then use us, we pray you, as you will, and always to your glory and the welfare of your people; through our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Amen. (Prayer of Self Dedication, Book of Common Prayer, Page 832).
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