"Jesus was troubled in spirit, and declared: "Very truly, I tell you, one of you will betray me." The disciples looked at one another, uncertain of whom he was speaking. One of his disciples--whom Jesus loved--was reclining next to him; Simon Peter therefore motioned him to ask Jesus of whom he was speaking. So while reclining next to Jesus, he asked him: "Lord, who is it?" Jesus answered, "It is the one to whom I give this piece of bread when I have dipped it in the dish." So when he had dipped the piece of bread, he gave it to Judas son of Simon Iscariot. After he received the piece of bread, Satan entered into him. Jesus said to him: "Do quickly what you are going to do." Now no one at the table knew why he said this to him. Some thought that, because Judas had the common purse, Jesus was telling him, "Buy what we need for the festival"; or, that he should give something to the poor. So, after receiving the piece of bread, he immediately went out, and it was night.
When he had gone out, Jesus said: "Now the Son of Man has been glorified, and God has been glorified in him. If God has been glorified in him, God will also glorify him in himself and will glorify him at once."
They say that dinner time can be the most contentious time of the day. How many television shows or movies have we seen where an emotional discussion happens while the characters are eating. May be a little brother has told his parents some big secret about his sister to his parents while everyone is dining. Suddenly the entire evening is thrown into chaos. Family is no longer eating peacefully because everyone is arguing. Mother is trying to calm the father down, while sister wants to beat up the brother that just told the secret. No one at the dinner table is happy. Yet, because there is a recognition that family is there, somehow they work things out. Things may not be quite the way they want it. The tensions need time to calm down.
It is one thing to eat with our friends and those we love. It is quite another to have dinner with someone who has caused us deep pain. It is something all together different when we know someone who is sitting at table with us is about to hurt us. Most of us would take that person to task right away. We would do everything within our power to stop that person from what ever they are about to do. The last thing we would think of doing is feeding that person. But Jesus does exactly that. Jesus feds Judas with bread. Jesus knows that Judas is about to betray him and hand him over. Jesus does not try to reason with Judas or persuade him away from what Judas is about to do. Jesus feeds Judas and sends him to do what Judas intends on doing.
The disciples are Jesus' family. They have lived with Jesus, traveled, listened and lodged with Jesus throughout much of his public ministry. Yet it is one of Jesus' own who betrays him. Jesus still chooses to love even the one who is about to turn him in and have him killed. Jesus loves Judas by feeding him.
Many lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgendered people have been hurt by members of their own family. This is particularly true for those LGBT people who have been raised in homes that are full of staunch conservatives Catholics and Christians. As soon as a questioning member of the family comes out and announces that they are LGBT, they might experience abandonment, shame and even get thrown out of their home. Such an experience happened to a gay youth in Atlanta who is bringing his boyfriend to the High School Prom. Because he has become news, his parents have thrown him out of the family home. Many parents have been known to take their gay youth to Exodus International where they are put into "change camps" after learning that their child is gay. The problem with such behavior on the part of the parents is they often end up closing the door for the gay youth to ever return and find peace within the family. For the LGBT youth, they are often turned out into a world where they learn about life the hard way. This is why many LGBT youth often wind up prostituting themselves and contract HIV/AIDS and other STD's.
LGBT people experience great pain from a variety of people. Parents, friends, churches, Priests, Bishops, the Pope, ministers, lay people and the names can be countless. However, it is important that LGBT people never stop trying to "feed" our opponents with the bread of what it means to be LGBT. Much of what happens to LGBT people is the result of unbelievable ignorance that results in a total lack of charity. It is so difficult to love those who continue to bash and hurt LGBT people. Given the political climate of groups such as the National Organization for Marriage (NOM), Focus on the Family and others, I don't think we will experience much relief from how much LGBT people will continue to experience. This is why it is important for LGBT people to become involved with a PFLAG group and find helpful resources and relationships. While it may be necessary to break some relationships for the time being, it is important that at some point in time everyone returns to the table to discuss things to see if new roads to reconciliation and healing can be begun. The reconciliation and healing cannot happen very quickly. There is just too much heart break and pain. But eventually, that pain needs to be faced for what it is. And in one way or another the walls need to be broken down. The biggest wall that often needs to be broken down so that healing and reconciliation can begin is prejudice.
Are we willing to feed the Judas' of our lives? Are we willing to come to the table with those who oppose us with the intention to feed them and in some cases allow them to feed us too. By no means should we accept being fed by discrimination often disguised as the best vegetable. But we can come to the conversation asking for the bread that is compassion, understanding and mercy that can be understood and shared by all. Can we offer that bread to those we are most angry with? I can honestly answer that question no on many accounts. I need the prayers of my friends and family and the healing of the Holy Spirit to arrive at that point. I am an individual who has my father's blood in me that says only my opinion counts. However, when we are talking about LGBT individuals and the prejudice we experience because of heterosexism, we are no longer talking about an opinion. We are talking about an attitude that is said to be an opinion to be the excuse for such biased behavior. We are not talking about excusing the behavior here. We are talking about conversing with the people who hold those opinions. They are the one's that need to know the Bread of Life that is Jesus Christ who is God's compassion, mercy, understanding and peace.
We pray for the healing of the hurt we experience because of heterosexism and ask God to lead us and those who have attitudes of discrimination to a place of reconciliation. We will get there if we can once in a while reach across the table and serve those who have hurt us. It will cost us something, just like sharing bread with Judas cost Jesus something. But the healing and peace we will know will find us sharing the joys of new life that the Easter Mysteries promise to bring us.
Lord God, who blessed Son our Savior gave his body to be whipped and his face to be spit upon: Give us grace to accept joyfully the sufferings of the present time, confident of the glory that shall be revealed; through Jesus Christ your Son our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. Amen. (Collect for Wednesday in Holy Week, BCP, Page 220).
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